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[personal profile] calie15
Title: The Love In Her Understanding
Rating: PG
Summary: Ever since she had returned, Oliver knew every time she turned those eyes on him he would bend over backwards, do anything for her. Yet at the same time he would do anything to make sure she was safe. Safe and with him, even if it meant not consulting her.
Notes: Spoilers for Season 10.

Oliver glanced down at his watch, frowning at the time as the elevator ascended. It was after five, and he had been making it a point to be home before four. Lois warned him that he was smothering, but in his opinion he was just being careful.

He wasn’t worried about her being there, he already knew she was, through his own means. Yet he didn’t even need to call out for her when he stepped through the door. Right away he found her, sitting at the array of computers situated in the penthouse. She had to know he was there, but she continued to look at the monitors as if she was alone. Not a glance in his direction or a tip of the end, not even a smile. Then she sighed, turning her face towards him, those green eyes wide, holding some kind of emotion he hadn’t determined yet. Sadness maybe, but he wasn’t sure. Panic clenched his heart. “What is it.”

Chloe swallowed and turned in the chair to face him. After pursing her lips she sighed. “I think we should talk.”

Within a moment he had forgotten how to breathe. His chest hurt, throat burned. It was the dreaded words of any relationship, but when it came to his and Chloe’s relationship most recently the words took on a whole different meaning. She was there though, she hadn’t taken off, she hadn’t called him about it, maybe it wasn’t as bad as he thought. Then her brow drew together in concern, lips pursing and frowning sadly, almost in pity. Stepping out of the gate slowly he watched her, and breathed. “What is it?”

“Maybe you should come here first,” she said gently, turning her head back up at the screens in front of her.

Swallowing, he blinked quickly and nodded. Taking even steps, doing his best not to appear he was rushing, Oliver closed the distance between them, passing the monitors and coming to stand at her side, turning to see what she saw. If the panic from her words was terrifying it was nothing compared to what he saw on the five monitors before him. He tried to swallow, but somehow couldn’t make his throat cooperate. “I-.” But there were no words, how could he explain?

“You should have talked to me,” she said softly, turning her head up and looking at him.

Oliver couldn’t turn to meet her, instead he just stared ahead. “Talk?” Oliver laughed, but there was no humor in it. “Talking doesn’t give me any piece of mind.” Finally, turning to look down at her, knowing that the pain and guilt he felt was etched on his face, he apologized. “I’m sorry, but I had to do something.”

“Ollie...” Chloe sighed. “You trust me.”

It was a statement, but Oliver could also hear the question in it. “Yes,” Oliver said without a doubt and nodded, turning to the screens again as he did so. “But how do I know when the next catastrophe will hit, another that will take you away from me for some reason or another.”

Standing, Chloe wedged herself between him and the computers. Placing a hand on his chest, she looked up at him. “Ollie, I understand that. Don’t you think I fear the same things? But this,” Chloe gestured behind her, “being this paranoid, keeping this from me, it isn’t healthy, take it from the person who was that person.”

There was pleading in her green eyes. Ever since she had returned, Oliver knew every time she turned those eyes on him he would bend over backwards, do anything for her. Yet at the same time he would do anything to make sure she was safe. Safe and with him, even if it meant not consulting her. Looking up again he sighed, surveying the lengths he had gone through to keep Chloe that way. He remember, what seemed like so long ago, when Chloe was that person. Making decisions on her own, that she thought was best, consulting no one. Pain and hurt had turned her into that...it was almost ironic that it was the pain she had caused him that had made him the same way.

Lists of files detailing her location from ever piece of jewelry, purse, and electronic equipment he could lo jack was available at his disposable. Video footage in and around the penthouse and the Watchtower were a click away. E-mails, cell phone records, credit card and bank records were all made easy for him to access.

It wasn’t that he monitored them everyday, surveying what she was doing. Perhaps he’d gotten a bit out of control with the GPS. She no doubt had found out he could find her location from his cell phone, his office, his laptop form anywhere around the world. That he did monitor. On the days when he hadn’t heard from her in a while, instead of calling her, he pulled up her location on GPS just to ease his mind. But the rest of it, it was just a safety net. If something did happen, then at least he knew he would have the resources he needed to find her.

A hand on his cheek drew his attention from the tangled web he had woven for himself. Looking down he found her staring up at him, eyes still kind with understanding, and for that he was grateful. No one but Chloe, with her own twisted past and mistakes, would understand.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered softly. “I didn’t know you felt like this.”

Of course she didn’t. Oliver very well couldn’t have told the love of his life that he was paranoid and had developed stalkerish tendencies because of it.

So instead he shook his head. “It’ll pass.”

“No, you have to tell me.” She insisted firmly. “Don’t hide how you are feeling from me. If anyone understands it I do.”

“No.” Oliver grasped her hand and pulled it down, holding it at his side. Looking into her eyes he paused for a moment, searching them for something that he wasn’t even sure of. “You don’t Chloe. I know what you mean, but it isn’t the same. The reasons are different.” Still she looked up at him patiently, waiting, wanting him to explain. “Do you know what it’s like to see you walk out the door, watch you walk away, wonder if you will walk back through it again. Or when I leave, do you know what it feels like, as the hours go by, to wonder more and more if you’ll be home when I get there.”

“I won’t ever disappear on you again. Ever. Not like that.”

There was conviction in her voice, sincerity, everything that should have been there, and she meant it. But Oliver also knew if it meant saving her he’d willingly give his own life, and he knew now she would do the same. He also knew that as time had gone by Chloe had managed to put her name on the map, and now she just wasn’t playing roll of sidekick, now she was valuable, now she had a target on her own back. There were more scenarios that ran through his head then just her walking out the door.

Lifting his hands, he grasped her face. “I can’t lose you, no matter what.” Then she smiled, that endearing smile, that he knew was just for him.

“I know,” she whispered, lashes fluttering as her eyes turned glassy. Slowly, she slid her hands up and rest them against his chest. “Likewise.”

Feeling his body finally relax, Oliver sighed and dropped his hands to her shoulders, sliding them down to lightly grasp her upper arms and turned back to the screens. “I know this was overboard, I’ll...” It was his intention to say he would stop being stop monitoring her movements, stop being keeping track of her every action, but that never came. Then maybe he thought he’d say he would tone it back, but that still never came. None of it was the truth, and he couldn’t lie to her, not when she just told him he needed to talk to her.

“We’ll figure it out,” Chloe said gently and pressed her palm to his cheek, turning his head back to face her.

He nodded, relieved that she wasn’t going to force him to broach the subject just yet. No one but Chloe, with her twisted past and questionable decision, would understand. It was part of the reason she had become so important to him, why he was drawn to her. Chloe was like him, she understood him and the way he was, she was okay with it. Chloe wasn’t perfect, by any means, and neither was he, but she was perfect for him, and that was why he couldn’t lose her. No one else could fill her place, and the thought of losing her again, scared the hell out of him. Dropping his head, Oliver pressed his forehead against her own. “I love you.”

Chloe smiled, slipping her free hand into his. “I love you too hero. Come on,” she said, one corner of her lips turning up into a playful smirk as she lowered her hand from his face and grasped his tie, “let’s get you out of this suit.”

At the tug of her hand he let her take the lead, guiding him away from his paranoia and to the bedroom. As they entered the bedroom and she turned to him, sliding the jacket from his shoulder, a small smile on her face, he could almost feel a weight lifting. It wasn’t all better, but his fears and doubts were out in the open, and Chloe, being the woman that he loved, understood them.

Date: 2011-02-08 01:57 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tehzo.livejournal.com
I loved this. He does go to extreme lengths to make sure he doesn't have to go through what he did again. But the subtly with which you brought it out, all I can think about is how terrified he is that it could happen, the pain he lived through when she was gone, his desperation...

I love that she understands him because she's been there before...and also because I feel she was hurting just as much as he was.

Thank you for this!

Date: 2011-02-08 02:00 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] calie15.livejournal.com
I didn't want him to seem nuts, I was a bit worried about that. But I did want him to seem he want overboard kind of. So scared that he was going behind her back, and it was only once I started writing it did I realize the similarities to Chloe last season.

So glad you liked it. I'm a bit obsessed right now with Oliver and him dealing with Chloe leaving him now that she is back. I have another fic in mind dealing with it.

Date: 2011-02-08 02:23 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tehzo.livejournal.com
That's one of the things I really enjoyed about it--the panic he feels because he knows he went overboard yet he's still going to do it because he needs to. It felt real and human...he won't even lie to her and tell her he'll stop.

I'd be obsessed with reading about it if you post another fic! :) It's not something that can be swept under the rug or forgotten so easily. Those months alone really messed him up and it's going to take time for him to feel safe again that way.

Date: 2011-02-08 03:11 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] calie15.livejournal.com
I have another idea...thinking it over. :) Maybe one about their first time taking up together. More about him of course, since he seems like he is the one more emotionally effected.

Date: 2011-02-08 02:19 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] novadelphine.livejournal.com
I'm so glad you wrote this. Even though I'm so happy that Chloe is back and that her and Ollie are together, I can't help but wonder what kind of damage her absence might have caused... even if her intentions were the best.

I think the paranoia you developed for Ollie is really probable and the connection you made to Chloe's own overbearing phase was really good.

Great job. Thanks for sharing this.

Date: 2011-02-08 03:13 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] calie15.livejournal.com
I totally agree. Her absence was enough to effect him for half a season. It needs to be addressed.

Thanks for the review!

Date: 2011-02-08 02:21 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] geek-or-unique.livejournal.com
I already said that to you, but I love how you questioned Chloe's decisions from last season. I love her, but I don't agree with everything she did. I understand her motives, but I don't agree.

Like I understand Oliver's actions here and I love how she understands too, because she's the only one who can, because she walked on his shoes.

Perfect as always. And I hope Smallville keeps you inspired for a really long time. LOL

Date: 2011-02-08 02:46 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ihearttvsnark.livejournal.com
Aw. That was really great. I could totally see Ollie being that paranoid and I can see Chloe being the only person who would understand that fear and the obsessive need to keep an eye on her because of the way she tried to keep an eye on him before. I love that he wouldn't lie to her and tell her he was going to stop and she understood and said they would figure it out. Nicely done. :)

Date: 2011-02-08 03:15 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] calie15.livejournal.com
I was really wanting to do an Oliver being a bit stalkerish after her return. Seemed kind of fun. :)

And I also really liked writing that he admitted to himself he couldn't stop.

Date: 2011-02-08 02:53 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] iluvaqt.livejournal.com
This was a beautiful, touching yet sadly plausible extension of Oliver's reaction and thoughts at the end of Collateral. You could see the anguish, fear and doubt on his face, watching her. Hoping that he could believe in a future but afraid to at the same time. He wants her and needs her, but her absence and her disappearance would weigh on him heavily, even with her warm and encouraging smile, even with the love in her voice and the faith in her eyes. I loved this. You know, Chlolliers would probably want to strangle me but I'd have actually preferred they have a confrontation and admission like this, than have a cutesy bed scene, not really touchingg on the feelings of them being separated.

Date: 2011-02-08 03:39 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] calie15.livejournal.com
Honestly, I've always loved playing with the negative/darker aspects of Oliver. So this is kind of part of that.

I just keep getting the feeling that her disappearance should be more explored. It affected him so much for the first half of the season. Obviously the time isn't there to explore it on the show, but Oliver I believe would have desertion issues to deal with.

And I agree about the confrontation. I think his hurt would turn into anger a bit. Not to much, because he knows she did it to save him, but against his will he would get angry because he hurt so badly.

Date: 2011-02-08 04:22 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] modern-fanatic.livejournal.com
I loved reading this.

It is so sweet the way that he wants to protect her. Ollie would do anything to make sure she would never leave again. I really enjoyed how everything was not totally out in the ope, but was expressed through their emotions and actions and not just words. You can really tell how much Oliver really loves Chloe and that if anything ever happened to her he would be heart broken.

It is truly heart warming how understanding Chloe is about the entire situation. She understands the pain and she would never want to go through that ever again.

I think what I loved the most was how realistic it was. Everything wasn't absolutely perfect between them. But they are trying to work towards that goal of being together and being happy.

Fantastic job and thank you for sharing. :)

Date: 2011-02-09 07:45 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] smallvillefics.livejournal.com
I love that he doesn't promise to do away with everything, and she doesn't ask. It's okay. It doesn't have to be an all or nothing thing, and it doesn't have to be decided right now. They'll work their way through it. They're them.

Date: 2011-02-09 11:49 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] brittany2922.livejournal.com
That was Awesome!

I love the similarities between what he was doing and what Chloe was doing last season, I also love that Chloe was able to acknowledge that he was acting the way she had been.

Great one-shot! =)

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